We all see the same news every day. One research study says doing XYZ is essential for pregnancy. And then 3 days later another research study says doing XYZ is terrible for pregnancy.
On top of that you have your mom, your mother-in-law, your sisters and your friends all chiming in with what you should and shouldn’t do during pregnancy.
It’s dizzying and crazy-making at best.
Here’s the truth about OB/GYNs
Not all doctors are made equal and not all doctors are good for you. You need to find the perfect physician for your specific situation.
Everyone else isn’t worth your time or hard-earned money.
Five sure-fire ways to spot a doctor who’s not good for you and who you need to fire and replace.
I hope that sharing this with you will save you time, money and heartache.
1) You feel rushed during your appointments.
Your doctor is your consultant.
That means you pay him/her for their time and expertise, just like you pay a gardener, lawyer or accountant for their time and expertise. You don’t put up with any of them rushing you when you’re talking to them, right? You shouldn’t put up with that from your doctor either.
2) They don’t look to find the source of the problem.
Bandaids are for cuts and scrapes, not for pregnancy.
If you keep complaining about headaches and the only solution you keep hearing about are pain meds….or if you keep telling your doctor “something is wrong” and they wave you off….RUN.
3) They make you feel bad when you ask a question, especially one they can’t answer.
We’ve all been there.
Sitting in the doctor’s office, nervous to ask a question but wanting more information.
You gather the courage to ask and it feels like you’ve either insulted your doctor or irritated them to no end.
You feel yourself sinking into your chair, cheeks flushed, wishing you’d never said anything at all.
This is NOT ok.
Make sure your doctor is open, willing and ready to answer any questions you have for him/her.
I’d much rather hear a doctor say, “I don’t know, let me look into that for you” than to make up an answer or blame me for asking. Wouldn’t you?
4) They don’t sufficiently explain your test results or treatment plan.
This is your body. Your health. Your pregnancy.
We are long past the time when doctors carried a mysterious medical file ,containing information about your health that you have no access to.
After every single blood test or ultrasound, you should receive the exact copy of the test results your doctor has.
You should ALWAYS know what the next steps in your treatment plan are, and your doctor must be able to zoom out and map out a general longer term treatment plan - even if it’s tentative.
And you MUST have access to this information. If your doctor is hiding anything from you - get out now.
5) Your gut tells you they’re not the right doctor for you.
This one is HUGE. Pay attention when things don’t feel right.
For example: You call the clinic about test results and the front staff or the nurse has no idea what you’re talking about. Hmm…..
Or your doctor is always writing while you’re talking, nodding as if paying attention but when you wait for an answer they ask you to repeat yourself because they actually weren’t listening. Not ok.
Here’s another one I hear about all the time:
Your doctor prescribes you a medication or a treatment that you’ve tried or already ruled out as an option for you, clearly not at all remembering previous conversations….or likely taking good notes! This is a huge red flag.
When a doctor is not right for you, the clues are ALWAYS there.
The only only question is whether you’re going to be honest with yourself, see the truth and do something about it or choose to ignore it.
If something seems odd, ASK.
Maybe there’s nothing wrong. Maybe your doctor has some personal issues going on that is impacting their work - in which case bringing it up is also helping them be a better doctor. And you’ll feel better that you said something.
On the other hand, if your doctor can’t explain what’s going on or waves you off as paranoid or crossing a line for questioning their care….that’s a HUGE problem.
What to do next
If you read this blog post and it really hit home for you, your immediate next step is to find a new doctor. Go through insurance, talk to friends and trusted loved ones on who they liked to work with.
But most importantly, do your homework. Make sure this new doctor is very well-versed in the complications you're going through. Ensure that they're taking new patients immediately and make an appointment right away, even if you're not due for a follow up any time soon.
Establishing the relationship early is key to smooth transfer of care.
I know this can be really nervewracking for many women so if you need help with the process - how to find the right doctor, what questions to ask to make sure you don't waste your time with the wrong provider again, etc. - then I can help.
Shoot me an email and in just 1 session we can get you on the path to the excellent prenatal care you deserve.
No one cares about your baby and your health more than you do. Make sure you put both in good hands.